One Too Many Part Three
by GeniaTheParadox
Summary: Yet another alcohol fueled party in Rachel's basement in which Kurt is a slutty drunk, this time set just after Hold On To Sixteen.
1. Chapter 1

You can never have too many drunken Glee Club parties. So here's one for Season Three, set just after Hold On To Sixteen, which was also around the time that I started this fic. It's taken me a while to get into the groove, so to speak. You don't really have to have read the previous instalments of 'One Too Many' to get this, but you can if you want. It helps, that's all I'm saying.

Some of the drunken hilarity that happens in this fic was suggested by my dearest Twitter husband, Jono. Also it was him who encouraged me to write another booze-fuelled Glee party fic in the first place. So please direct some of your love to him. My darling hubby deserves it.

Anyway, reviews would be just peachy.

And I don't own Glee. Otherwise all these parties would be actual episodes.

* * *

><p><strong>One Too Many – Part Three<strong>

New Directions were in high spirits after their win at Sectionals, not to mention the return of Sam Evans and the important members of the Troubletones, so a celebration was in order. As was now a kind of bizarre tradition, everybody piled into Rachel's basement – her Dads were out of town for the week for their biannual trip to Dollywood – and in no time the alcohol was flowing. For once Rachel didn't take much persuasion to throw a party. She was so happy to have all of the Glee Club together that she didn't even mind when Puck raided her Dads' liquor cabinet and brought along his 'beer ball', so soon everybody was falling into their drunken archetypes with gusto.

Brittany had already discarded most of her clothing and was up on the table with Santana, who wasn't quite hammered enough to start weeping yet and was instead grinding along to the blaring Nicki Minaj song. Finn was once again the designated driver, and was being thoroughly ignored by his girlfriend. Rachel was too busy tipsily dancing and laughing with none other than Quinn to pay any attention to her sober boyfriend. Tina and Mercedes were laughing their heads off as Mike, Puck and Artie made fun of each other, while Sam looking on longingly at Mercedes. This was the first time that either Rory or Sugar had ever gotten drunk – Rory was swaying next to Finn, watching Brittany and Santana with his mouth slightly open, while Sugar was up on the stage, dancing by herself and singing terribly along to the music.

Even though the last two parties had ended in embarrassment and one particular event that was never to be spoken of ever again, Kurt was in the mood to celebrate, so he and Blaine drank along with everyone else. So far they'd spent most of the night dancing together and roughly making out like there was nobody else in the room.

"Kurt!" Rachel called, stumbling over to the couple while still hand in hand with Quinn.

Kurt turned his head in her direction, as Blaine continued to kiss and suck on his neck.

"Can I help you?"

"As much as I want everybody to have a good time at my party," she slurred. "I'd prefer it if you and Blaine didn't end the evening by having sex in my bed."

"Fine," said Kurt with an arched eyebrow, stroking Blaine's hair. "We'll just do it in the guest room again."

Rachel groaned as Quinn giggled against her shoulder. "I'd rather you didn't have sex _at all!_ You guys always make such a mess and I'm sick of having to chuck out my bed linen! I don't want anybody doing it in my house tonight!"

There was a loud laugh from up on the table.

"Are you kidding, Berry?" said Santana. "Obviously you and Finnocence are gonna end up doing the nasty tonight. I know you guys are screwing now and frankly, dwarf, I'm disappointed in you."

"W-what?" Rachel stuttered. "Huh... how didn't you even know?"

"I've got a sixth sense about these things," Santana said simply, Brittany dancing beside her. "When I first figured out that Blurt and Klaine were getting their butt-sex on I was happy for them. It made for some hot mental images and there's something about those twinks that suggests they're both awesome in the sack..."

"Accurate!" Kurt and Blaine both called out in unison.

"...but with you and Lumps the Clown," Santana continued. "I was just... _disappointed. _Especially since I already told you that sex with Gigantor sucked. Never thought I'd ever say this, Man Hands, but you could actually do a lot better. In fact, you _did_ do a lot better. Jesse St. James may have been a douche, but at least he actually had game. You've totally downgraded, Treasure Trail."

"I can hear you, y'know!" Finn yelled from where he was sitting, but Santana paid no attention and went back to dancing up against Brittany.

"Don't listen to her, Finn," said Rachel as she stumbled over to him. "Having sex with you was just... it was... erm... it was lovely!"

"...thanks," Finn said with a frown. It had taken her an awfully long time just to come up with the word 'lovely'.

"_Raaaaach_, come and dances with me!" Quinn whined, pulling at the shorter girl's hand.

Rachel let Quinn pull her away into the middle of the room without argument, dancing and twirling with her in a fit of giggles. Finn frowned as he watched his girlfriend and his ex-girlfriend dance. Even with Jesse gone he just couldn't seem to catch a break. He actually missed the previous Glee Club parties when Rachel would be a Needy Drunk and fawn all over him – at least he got some attention.

Meanwhile, Kurt and Blaine's making out was once again interrupted, this time by Brittany.

"Kurt, Kurt, Kurt!" she squealed as she climbed off the table, much to Santana's disappointment. "Are you gonna be making out with everyone tonight like you usually do? Please say yes..."

"Of course he is," Blaine said straight away with a huge grin.

"Apparently I am," Kurt said casually.

Brittany cheered, before pulling Kurt out of Blaine's arms and crashing her lips on his, her arms wrapped around his neck. Kurt was taken aback, but quickly got into the swing of things and kissed her back deeply as he heard Blaine giggle happily beside him. When they separated Brittany cheered again.

"Oh, that is always so awesome!" she cried. "Santana, Santana! You've got to kiss Kurt, it's _so_ awesome!"

Santana huffed as she got off the table. "I guess it won't be so bad to see what all the fuss is about... plant one on me, Princess."

Kurt smirked, as Brittany and Blaine grinned in excitement, holding onto each other and swaying to the music. Santana just rolled her eyes, before letting Kurt take her by the waist and kiss her. The moment their lips met Santana let out a surprising sigh, running her fingers through the hair on the nape of Kurt's neck as he explored her mouth with his tongue like a pro. When they eventually parted Santana looked awestruck.

"Damn, Porcelain," she said, sounding deeply impressed. "That was actually epic."

"So I've been told," said Kurt with a little shrug.

"Seriously," said Santana. "I totally get what Britt and Frodo Baggins and everyone else keeps on going on about, Lady Face. Me gusta. Me gusta mucho. No wonder you gave Puck a boner that time."

Kurt and Blaine shared a knowing smirk. They'd given Puck _more_ than a boner... but they weren't supposed to talk about that.

"Oooh, Kurt," Brittany said suddenly. "You should kiss Rory! And Sugar!"

"I heard my name," Sugar said from the stage. "What's going on?"

Brittany rushed over in her absurdly high heels and grabbed Sugar by the hand, practically dragging her over to Kurt before giving any kind of explanation.

"Sugar, you totally need to make out with Kurt," she said eagerly. "Almost everyone in Glee Club has and it's _the best_."

"But I thought you only kissed boys," Sugar said, looking at Kurt with an arched eyebrow.

"Not when I'm drunk, sweetie," said Kurt. "I'm not saying that I've enjoyed kissing all these girls, but I'm much more generous while intoxicated. Especially with Blaine's encouragement."

"Everyone should kiss Kurt at least once in their life," Blaine slurred. "It's a magical experience."

"I'm gonna have to agree with Curly McHobbit," said Santana with a nod. "That is one magic mouth."

"Oh, you have no idea," Blaine grinned.

"Also," Kurt added. "Blaine's a perv and he likes to watch me with other people, regardless of gender."

"I'm not even sorry," Blaine laughed, before getting himself another drink.

"Well, I _am_ a very good kisser," Sugar said thoughtfully, her speech slurred from the alcohol. "Okay then."

Kurt let out a sigh – he'd kissed far too many girls already tonight – and pulled Sugar into a kiss that started off soft and slow but, after Sugar's rather loud moan, quickly became harder and more passionate. Once Kurt managed to detach himself from a reluctant Sugar, she let out a long "_Wow..." _

"I know right!" Brittany said merrily, before rushing over to Rory and pulling him to his feet. "Come on, Rory, you've got to kiss Kurt, it's so amazing!"

"But I'm... I'm not gay," Rory said nervously as Brittany dragged him over to Kurt.

"That doesn't matter," she insisted. "Kurt's kissed lots of guys who aren't gay."

"Finally, I get to kiss a boy," Kurt said with a sigh of relief.

Blaine took a large, messy gulp of his drink before saying "Yaaay! This is going to be hot!"

Rory was blushing quite furiously, swaying where he stood and very aware that most of the room were now watching him and spurring him on. Kurt smiled and took hold of both of Rory's hands.

"Don't worry," he said kindly. "I'll be gentle with you."

Rory smiled awkwardly and nodded. "O-okay."

"Welcome to America," Kurt said, before cupping Rory's face in his hands and kissing him ever so softly. Their kiss was slow and careful, but oh so sensual. Rory was completely deaf to all the whooping and laughing going on in the room. He couldn't believe that kissing another boy could actually feel so good, and before he knew it he was kissing Kurt back, holding cautiously onto the older boy's waist. When they separated Rory let out a breath that he hadn't even realised he was holding, and Kurt grinned.

"I just had a crazy idea," he said to a speechless Rory. "I think you and Sugar Motta would be really cute together. Why don't you share your lovely kissing skills with her?"

"Oh, erm..." Rory mumbled, dazed from both the booze and Kurt's kiss. "Yeah, sure... okay."

Kurt went over to Sugar and took her by the hand, pulling her over to him and Rory.

"Sugar," he said in a parental sort of way. "You and Rory should make out."

She narrowed her slightly bleary eyes. "Erm... why?"

"Because I said so," Kurt said simply. "Go over there and make out. You'll love it, I promise."

Kurt shoved Rory and Sugar into a seat together, where they blushed and giggled before eventually leaning into a slightly awkward kiss. When they separated they looked at each other and grinned tipsily, before Sugar grabbed Rory and they were making out with messy enthusiasm.

"Ah, playing matchmaker again, I see?" said Blaine, coming up behind his boyfriend and wrapping his arms around him.

Kurt turned in Blaine's arms with a sly smile. "Well, it's the least I can do."

"Kurt, you're so sweet," Blaine cooed. "And you're so kind and... and nice!"

"Yes, I am all of those things," Kurt nodded. "Also I'm really pretty."

"And wonderful kisser."

"And an incredible lay."

"Of course!"

They suddenly burst into fits of drunken giggles, holding each other up as they laughed. It was difficult to tell how much time had passed or how much more alcohol everyone had drank, but suddenly Rachel was up on the stage with Quinn, the two girls singing a loud and giggly rendition of 'I Kissed a Girl'. The rest of the girls in the room were singing along, especially Santana and Brittany, who added their own raunchy dance moves to it. Rachel and Quinn were still holding hands as they sang together, which made Finn frown. He didn't even know why he was jealous. He just wished that they'd quit being so close... and Rachel would stop ignoring him... and they weren't singing a song about sexual experimenting at a party. It worried him. When they finished the song most of the guys, along with Santana and Brittany, were chanting "Kiss! Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!" and clapping their hands until Rachel and Quinn, blushing furiously, leaned in and pecked each other on the lips. Amongst all the cheering and wolf whistles, Finn felt even more worried.

Sugar untangled herself from Rory and rushed to the stage, snatching up a bedazzled microphone so she could sing, but it was unceremoniously wrestled out of her hands by Santana.

"This is a party, Motta," she said, holding the mic out of Sugar's reach. "Listening to you brutally murdering a song will just ruin the fun atmosphere."

Sugar eventually gave up with a huff and slouched back to her seat on Rory's lap, glaring at Santana as he tried to continue their make out session. Santana and Brittany got up on the stage and began singing Rihanna's 'S&M', grinding up against one another and playfully spanking each other's asses. Tina, Mike, Mercedes, Puck and Artie all moved to the middle of the room to dance along, while Finn stayed in his seat, staring resentfully at Rachel and Quinn and wishing that he'd decided to drink tonight after all. After helping themselves to another drink, Kurt and Blaine went to sit either side of Sam, who'd been watching Mercedes dance while nursing his beer.

"Not in the partying mood, Samuel?" Kurt asked, not sounding nearly as drunk as he was.

Sam shrugged. "What makes you say that?"

"Well, you've done nothing but stare at Mercedes all night," said Kurt matter-of-factly.

"Have I been that obvious?" Sam chuckled sadly.

"Yeah, super obvious," said Blaine, nodding along to Santana and Brittany's song. "You got it _bad_."

"And she's happily spoken for, so you're totally wasting your time," Kurt said bluntly.

"It's a shame though," said Blaine. "You guys were a cute couple."

"And I was the one that made you get together a few parties ago," Kurt added. "So from a matchmaker's point of view it's extra disappointing. Also I like you way better than Shane."

"But you still really need to move on, Sam."

"And we're here to help with that."

"Wait, what?" said Sam, eyebrows furrowed. "How?"

"What you need, Sammy," said Kurt with a smirk, resting his hand on the blonde's shoulder. "Is a nice rebound to take your mind of things."

Sam looked from Kurt to Blaine, who was also smirking, and back again, completely baffled.

"I really don't get what you guys are talking about," he said slowly.

"We're offering up our services," said Blaine happily.

"Ever since we met," said Kurt airily. "I always had the feeling that you weren't 100% straight. Maybe like, bi-curious or something, even with all the girlfriends you've had."

"Wait," Sam said, holding up his hands. It all finally clicked in his booze muddled head. "Are you guys offering to... to _have sex_ with me?"

"That's exactly what we're doing, yes," Kurt nodded.

"At Rachel's last party," said Blaine, his speech a little slurred. "And you probably wouldn't have noticed because you were making out with Mercedes the whole time. But at the last party Kurt and I had a threesome with Puck that we're not supposed to talk about, thanks mainly to Lauren Zizes since it was her idea. She wanted to watch."

Sam wiped his mouth, as he'd just choked on his sip of beer. "Are you serious? You guys and... and _Puckerman?_"

"Don't tell him we told you," said Blaine. "We've been sworn to secrecy. It was just a bit of drunken experimenting."

"He loved it though," said Kurt smugly. "It is such a shame that he insists on being straight."

"The point is that you won't be the first threesome me and Kurt have ever had," Blaine continued. "So if you want to let off a little steam later and want to forget about Mercedes then we're here for you, man. Kurt gives a terrific blowjob."

"Yes, really I do," Kurt agreed. "So how about it?"

Sam didn't know what to say. He wasn't even entirely sure whether Kurt and Blaine were being serious, and he was still getting over the idea of the couple actually having a threesome with Puck. Strangely, the mental images weren't entirely unpleasant.

"I... I don't know," he finally mumbled with an awkward shrug.

"We'll give you time to think about it," said Blaine, patting Sam on the back.

"And maybe drink a little more," said Kurt. "That always helps with this kind of decision making."

They both stood up before Sam could think of anything to say. He couldn't believe that had just happened. He also couldn't believe that he was genuinely considering it...

The party continued and everyone became steadily drunker. Santana finally dissolved into slightly hysterical tears, sobbing incoherently onto Brittany's shoulder. Rachel had managed to ignore Finn's existence even more than she had been before, and was once again up on the stage with Quinn, loudly singing 'We Found Love' with her. Sugar was still sitting on Rory's lap, the two making out like they'd recently been poisoned and the antidote was in each other's mouths. Tina and Mike were throwing some alarming shapes in the middle of the room, narrowly avoiding hitting Mercedes and Artie, who were dancing beside them, several times. Just as Puck sat down with a fresh beer Kurt and Blaine, who had been dancing together nearby, suddenly went to sit either side of him.

"Hey, Noah," Kurt said with a seductive purr, squeezing Puck's thigh. Blaine stroked Puck's arm at the same time.

"Guys," Puck slurred, rolling his eyes. "I get that you're sluts when you're wasted, but can't you come on to someone else for a change."

"Oh, we have," said Blaine with a grin. "We've already asked Sam if he'd like to have sex with us. We're just giving him time to think about it."

"If he says yes you're welcome to join us, Noah," said Kurt flirtatiously. "The more the merrier, I say."

Puck laughed in spite of himself. "You guys are insane."

Kurt lightly kissed Puck on the corner of the mouth, softly and slowly, his hand moving steadily up the mohawked jock's thigh.

"Don't act like you didn't love it, baby," he purred. "I know Lauren isn't here to watch, but don't let her absence discourage you from joining us again."

"Wait," said Puck, suddenly serious. "You guys didn't tell Sam about... about _us_, did you?"

Kurt and Blaine looked at each other, and both said "No."

"Oh... good," said Puck with a sigh of relief.

Kurt and Blaine giggled tipsily, still squeezing Puck's thighs and stroking his overgrown mohawk.

"Can you guys go away now?" Puck said, trying not to enjoy the attention to much. "I'm really not in the mood for all this... _gay_."

Rather than answering or leaving, Kurt turned Puck's head to face him and planted a hard kiss on his lips. Puck moaned before he could stop himself, letting Kurt push his soft tongue into his mouth. He'd forgotten what an amazing kisser Kurt was, and suddenly other memories started popping into his head. Like how awesome Kurt's mouth felt around his dick, and how tight Kurt's ass had felt while fucking him. He couldn't quite hide his disappointment when their lips separated, but soon Blaine had turned his head and kissed him too, the ex-Warbler wantonly sucking Puck's tongue into his mouth. Puck was a little breathless when they separated, and there was a familiar tightness in his pants.

"He's still not very good at that, is he?" Kurt said conversationally.

"Not really, no," said Blaine with a shrug. "But his cock makes up for it."

"Totally."

They both got up to dance again before Puck could even think of a response to that. He looked across the room and noticed Sam staring from him to Kurt and Blaine with wide eyes. Puck had a horrible feeling that Sam knew a lot more about what had happened at the last party than Kurt and Blaine had let on.

The party became somewhat of a blur, but a few drinks and karaoke songs later Brittany suddenly squealed.

"Kurt! Tina! I found 'Single Ladies' in Rachel's party playlist! We totally have to do the dance, come on!"

Kurt and Tina untangled themselves from their respective boyfriends and got up on the stage with Brittany, Kurt taking his place in between the two girls as the song started. Everybody cheered once they started to dance, some people singing along to the song. Kurt hadn't done the dance in a while but he still remembered every single step perfectly, and was much better than the girls, who kept on turning in the wrong direction or stumbling because they were so wasted.

Maybe it was because he was drunk, or because he was up on stage and had such a raucous audience, or because Blaine was watching, but Kurt was dancing like a total stripper – an achievement since he was probably the most fully clothed person on stage. He was very aware that his ungodly tight black jeans made his ass look fantastic and didn't leave much to the imagination around the crotch area either, so when he shook his hips he knew that Blaine would be enjoying the view – he certainly looked pleased when Kurt combed through his hair and slapped his ass.

Kurt took a very over the top bow with lots of hand flourishing once the song was finished, everyone cheering and clapping and wolf whistling. As he looked around the room Kurt was glad to see that Blaine's eyes were dark with lust, Sam was blushing quite furiously and Puck had covered his lap with a pillow and was avoiding his gaze. Kurt smirked, feeling extremely pleased with himself as his boyfriend rushed over and pulled him off the stage.

"You are so insanely hot, Kurt," Blaine said, his voice sounding husky as he held his boyfriend close. "You could easily be an exotic dancer or something. I mean, that was just so_ sexy_."

"You really think so?" Kurt asked sweetly, making his eyes go all big and innocent looking.

"Absolutely," said Blaine with a slight growl to his voice. "It's not too early to go upstairs and find a nice bed for me to fuck you senseless in, is it?"

"We still don't know if we're taking Sam or Puck with us, sweetie," said Kurt. "You're going to have to be a little patient."

Blaine pouted childishly. "But _Kuuuuurt, _I don't wanna _wait!_ I want us to go have sex _now!"_

"Oh, Blainers," Kurt cooed, stroking his boyfriend's fluffy, gel-less hair. "If you wait just a little while longer then we'll have Sam or Puck with us. And when we have one of them then I promise that we'll go upstairs and have lots of really awesome sex. I think I might even be able to convince Sam to bottom if we get him, so you can even watch me fuck him. But you'll only get that lovely treat if you practice a little patience, mister."

"Promise?" Blaine asked, still pouting like a toddler.

"I promise, honey."

Blaine grinned and kissed Kurt quickly on the lips. "Okay, I can wait."

He didn't have to wait long. The party began to wind down as it approached the early hours of the morning, the music now much slower and quieter than before. Santana and Brittany had disappeared upstairs. Mike and Tina were slow dancing in the middle of the room, fiercely making out at the same time. Puck, Artie and Mercedes were all sitting together, talking and joking. Finn was sitting with them, but was too busy glaring at Rachel and Quinn, who were also slow dancing together, to join in with the conversation. Rory and Sugar were so drunk that they'd passed out on the couch, lying half on top of each other, but no one seemed to take any notice of them. Sam had just downed another drink, finally making his decision. He stumbled over to Kurt and Blaine, who were sitting together on the edge of the stage, and sat beside them.

"Do you guys really think that I don't have a shot with Mercedes?" he asked, his eyes not quite focused.

"Not at all," Kurt said simply. "And even if you tried, if Shane found out you hit on his girlfriend he'd kick your ass."

Blaine nodded in agreement, swaying slightly.

Sam took a deep breath and said very quickly, as if the words were falling out of his mouth "Okay, I'll do it with you guys."

"Oh my God, seriously?" said Blaine, positively bouncing with excitement.

Sam nodded. "Yeah, why not? I made out with one or two guys at my old boarding school, so..."

"I knew it," said Kurt with a triumphant smile.

Blaine's eyes had lit up and he was grinning from ear to ear. "This is going to be _so_ awesome!"

The three of them stood up, Kurt the steadiest on his feet, and made their way across the basement to the stairs, pretty much unnoticed by everyone else in the room.

"Don't worry, Sammy," Kurt said, smirking deviously. "Blaine and I will be gentle with you."

* * *

><p>Part Three and a Half will be published as soon as I've actually written it, Humble Readers.<br>That's going to be the part with all the smut.  
>Don't worry, guys, I shan't leave you hanging. I'm typing as fast as I can.<p>

xxx


	2. Chapter 2

Here's the part of the fic with all the Kublam smut, as promised. Enjoy yourselves, Paradox Perverts.

And chuck some reviews at me.

Also I don't own Glee and blah, blah, blah.

* * *

><p><strong>One Too Many – Part Three and a Half<strong>

Kurt led the way upstairs, Blaine holding his hand with an excited spring in his step and Sam right behind them, feeling nervous. Rachel's bedroom door had a sign saying _'KEEP OUT! That means YOU, Kurt and Blaine!'_ stuck to it, and the noises coming from Rachel's Dads' room suggested that Santana and Brittany were putting it to good use, so the three boys piled into the guest room. Blaine immediately kicked off his shoes and threw himself on the bed, almost bouncing off it in his hast. Kurt took hold of Sam's hands, pulling him closer.

"Relax, Sammy," he said, wrapping his arms around the blonde's neck. "Blaine and I are going to make this very enjoyable for you."

Sam wasn't entirely sure what to say, but he stopping thinking altogether once Kurt pulled him into a slow, sensual kiss. Sam was one of the few members of the Glee Club that hadn't been kissed by Kurt, but he knew straight away what all the fuss was about. Kurt's lips were deliciously soft and his tongue explored Sam's mouth like a pro. Sam moaned into Kurt's mouth without even realising it, kissing Kurt back, and was only half aware of Blaine giggling on the bed. When Kurt finally pulled away Sam couldn't quite hide his disappointment.

"You guys are so hot together," Blaine said in awe.

Kurt grinned, pulling Sam over to the bed. The moment he sat down Blaine crawled onto his lap, straddling the blonde former jock, and crashed their lips together. Sam was taken aback, but kissing Blaine actually felt just as good as kissing Kurt did. Kurt watched for a while – they looked _amazing_ together – before kissing up Sam's jaw and turning the boys' feverish making out into a messy three-way kiss. None of them were quite sure how long their kiss lasted, as it was all sort of a blur of hands and lips and tongues, but Kurt very suddenly pulled away and stood up.

"You guys carry on," he said over his shoulder as he walked out of the door. "I'll be right back!"

Sam didn't have much time to comprehend that Kurt had left the room. Blaine was grinding down against his crotch, kissing him hard and fierce, grabbing fistfuls of his blonde hair, so it was difficult to think about anything else. Without even realising it, Sam grabbed Blaine's ass and squeezed, making the smaller boy moan into his mouth and kiss him even harder. He must be bi after all, Sam thought to himself, because this felt awesome. It was just as good as making out with a girl – possibly even better, since he'd never gotten this far with Quinn, Santana or Mercedes. They separated for a second, trying to catch their breath, and Blaine giggled.

"You're trouty mouth really is fun to kiss," he slurred.

"Yeah, I've been told," said Sam.

"Kurt told me that Finn told him that you were working as a stripper," Blaine said, swaying slightly on Sam's lap.

Sam blushed. "It was just for the money, man."

"That's what I figured," said Blaine. "But that must mean that you have a pretty awesome body then, right?"

Sam shrugged, trying and failing to look modest. "Never had any complaints."

Blaine grinned and pulled Sam's t-shirt over his head in one swift move, throwing it over his shoulder. He let out a low whistle of appreciation as he took in Sam's body.

"Damn," he said, looking hungrily at those toned abs. "You're like an Abercrombie model or something. You're _much_ hotter than Puckerman."

"Thanks," Sam laughed.

Just then Kurt came back into the room, looking slightly harassed.

"Honestly," he said, rolling his eyes as he put a bottle and a box on the bedside cabinet. "Santana was so _impossible _when I went into Rachel's Dads' room to get some condoms and lube. Brittany didn't mind at all when I interrupted them – hell, she even asked if I wanted to join in – but Santana just started yelling at me in Spanish."

"Kurt!" Blaine said excitedly. "Look how hot Sam is! Isn't Sam so hot?"

Kurt looked over at his boyfriend sitting astride the shirtless Sam and smirked. "Oh goody, clothes are being removed. And I agree, honey, Sam really is _delicious_. No wonder they called him White Chocolate back at the strip club."

Sam chuckled and shook his head, as Blaine gasped.

"You're stripper name was White Chocolate?" he laughed. "That is _amazing_."

"Let's see if you live up to that name, Sammy," Kurt said with a seductive purr.

He kicked his shoes off and crawled back onto the bed so he was kneeling right behind Sam, gently caressing his back and shoulders, and began kissing his neck and sucking his earlobe. Sam groaned, moving his head back to give Kurt more skin to kiss. Blaine watched in awe, his erection straining against his pants, before he too started kissing Sam's neck, moving down his collarbone. Kurt turned Sam's head to catch his lips in a kiss just as Blaine's mouth closed around one of his nipples, making Sam groan into Kurt's mouth. He was so turned on that he could barely stand it. He'd most likely blame the alcohol tomorrow, but right now he didn't care about anything but the two guys making him shiver with pleasure.

"We're all still wearing way too many clothes," Kurt said, pulling away from Sam and taking his shirt off. Blaine pulled his own shirt off, nearly falling off of Sam's lap in the process, before helping Kurt push Sam down onto the middle of the bed. Sam awkwardly kicked his shoes off, lifting his head to watch as the couple above him worked together to take his pants and underwear off. They both wore matching smirks when they saw what they were working with.

"Nice," said Kurt. "You're actually a lot bigger than Puckerman, but don't tell him I said that."

Sam's chuckle turned into a deep moan as Kurt lowered his head and dragged his tongue up the thick length in front of him, sucking on the crown and lapping up the hot pre-come. Kurt held onto the base of Sam's cock and wrapped his lips around the head, flicking his tongue over the leaking hole before he took as much of the impressive length in his mouth as possible, sucking hard. Sam threw his head back and cried out, tugging slightly on Kurt's hair as the pale boy bobbed his head faster and faster. He'd never felt anything so incredible, so absolutely mind-blowing.

Blaine sat back and watched for a while, loving the way Kurt hollowed his cheeks and whimpered quietly around Sam's cock – it was beautiful to watch. Eventually Blaine lowered his head too, spreading Sam's legs so he could tongue his balls. Sam tangled his fingers in Blaine's curls, moaning and babbling incoherently as the two boys made him fall apart. Sam spread his legs wider so Blaine's mouth could travel even lower, Kurt still sucking him off with skilful enthusiasm. Suddenly he cried out.

"Oh my fucking God!"

Sam arched his back and threw his head against the pillow as Blaine started probing and teasing his hole with his tongue. Sam had _definitely_ never felt anything like this before but, along with Kurt's magical mouth around his cock, he was pretty sure that this would be the orgasmic death of him. Blaine pushed the tip of his tongue into Sam's hole, licking over and over, as Kurt swirled his tongue around Sam's length, moaning around him. Sam's whole body was trembling, he felt like he was going to go insane with the intense pleasure of it all, and finally his climax hit him like a ton of bricks and he erupted into Kurt's mouth, tugging on Kurt and Blaine's hair and letting out a scream so loud that he was sure everyone back in the basement would be able to hear.

"Oh my God," he gasped, lying breathlessly back on the bed like a sweaty rag doll. "Holy shit... that was... that was fucking... fucking awesome... oh my God..."

He looked up to see Kurt and Blaine making out with relish, clearly sharing his seed. Sam didn't think it could be possible considering how exhausted he was, but he was already starting to feel turned on again. When they separated the couple both smirked at him.

"You taste awesome, White Chocolate," Kurt purred, Blaine nodding in agreement.

Sam's brain wasn't quite working well enough to respond, but he knew that he wasn't expected to. Kurt crawled onto of him, lying half on top of him with the prominent bulge in his skinny jeans pressing against the blonde's thigh. Blaine sat back, just watching, his eyes so dark with lust that it would have been frightening had it not been so hot.

"Back at the party," said Kurt, his voice still an irresistible purr. "I promised Blaine that he could watch me fuck you. He _really_ likes to watch, you see. You don't mind being on the bottom, do you?"

"Erm," Sam mumbled, feeling somewhere between nervous and hopelessly turned on. "I... I don't know. I've never done that sort of thing before."

"Kurt's very good," Blaine said with a grin. "And being on the bottom feels totally awesome, so long as you relax and just go with it."

"I'll be very gentle with you, Sammy," Kurt said, stroking Sam's hair.

Sam could feel his sensitive cock twitching back to life just thinking about Kurt being inside him, fucking him into the mattress, and his toes actually curled when he thought about Blaine watching them and touching himself, the pupils of his eyes so blown out that you could barely see the startling hazel, making his gaze even more sexy and intense... maybe even Blaine joining in. Sam shivered. "Okay."

"Yaaay!" Blaine cheered, looking impossibly excited.

"Wonderful," Kurt smirked, sitting up to take his pants off.

Blaine took his pants and underwear off too, almost toppling off the edge of the bed in the process, as Kurt grabbed a condom and the bottle of lube from the bedside cabinet. Sam looked down at Kurt's cock, rock hard and leaking and considerably bigger than he expected, and he was once again overcome with a mixture of nerves and excitement.

"Relax," Kurt whispered.

He traced his finger around Sam's puckered hole, which was already wet with Blaine's saliva, covering it in lube before very slowly pushing his finger in a little bit. Sam gasped at the intrusion, tensing up even though he knew he was supposed to relax. It wasn't exactly painful, just..._ weird._ Kurt gave his boyfriend a meaningful look, and Blaine immediately lay beside Sam and kissed him, playing with his nipples to distract him further until Kurt was able to push his finger into Sam's opening all the way up to the knuckle. Sam whimpered against Blaine's lips and Kurt pushed and twisted his finger in and out until the tight ring of muscles were relaxed enough for him to add a second finger. Sam pushed down against Kurt's hand, losing himself in Blaine's kiss and Kurt's fingers. Kurt scissored his fingers to stretch Sam out more, adding a third and curling them until Sam threw his head back against the pillow and let out a loud and surprisingly high pitched moan.

"Looks like I found your sweet spot," Kurt chuckled deviously. "Ready for me, Sammy?"

Sam was beyond words – Kurt was still fingering him and Blaine was still playing with his nipples – so all he could do was nod. He whined at the loss when Kurt removed his fingers, but sat up a little to watch as Blaine unrolled a condom onto Kurt's cock and slicked him up with lube, the two of them staring so intensely into each other's eyes that it was practically feral.

"Make him scream, sweetheart," Blaine whispered huskily, kissing his boyfriend before he went and sat on the other side of the bed to watch.

Kurt positioned himself between Sam's legs, catching his lips in a hard kiss as he pushed his cock into Sam's opening in one swift move. Sam groaned into Kurt's mouth – it hurt but he just didn't care. Kurt sat up and hooked his hands under Sam's thighs, spreading the blonde's legs wider and thrusting into him hard and fast, not bothering to be gentle as he was far too horny for all that. Kurt was grunting and growling, sounded much manlier than Sam had ever thought was possible for the fashionable little soprano, and Sam was clinging to the headboard with both hands, moaning louder and louder.

Blaine was breathless as he watched, barely letting himself blink so he wouldn't miss a single second. He stroked and squeezed his leaking cock, trying to keep his hand in time with his boyfriend's hard thrusts into Sam's ass. Suddenly he grabbed the bottle of lube and covered his fingers with some of the cool liquid, lying beside Sam and pushing two wet fingers into himself, bending his arm at an awkward angle as he stretched himself out. His moan drew the attention of the other two boys. Sam tried to turn his head to watch, but Kurt's cock managed to his that magical spot inside him and the pleasure was too intense for him to do anything other than cry out in ecstasy.

"You filthy little tease," Kurt purred, watching Blaine without missing a single thrust into Sam.

Blaine chuckled, grabbing another condom and slipping it onto Sam's dripping erection, and covering it with more lube. Kurt stopped his movements as Blaine straddled Sam, both boys holding onto Blaine's hips as he slowly lowered himself onto Sam's cock until he was completely impaled. Blaine gave himself a second to get used to the fullness, leaning back against Kurt's shoulder so they could share a slow, sensual kiss. Sam was seeing stars once they all started to move again, the three quickly working out a kind of rhythm. Blaine felt so tight around his cock, riding him hard and fast, and Kurt was slamming into his ass mercilessly, hitting that sweet spot every time – it was a miracle that Sam was still alive.

The bed was banging hard against the wall, making the things on the beside cabinets fall to the floor. The three boys were screaming so loud that there was no way that everyone back in basement wouldn't be able to hear. None of them cared though, especially Sam. He'd never felt anything so impossibly epic. This was it, he thought, this was how he was going to die. There was no way that he could possibly survive this. Kurt was the first to reach his climax, biting down on Blaine's shoulder to muffle his scream and pounding messily into Sam until he was spent. Blaine and Sam were only seconds behind, coming in unison – Blaine erupted all over Sam's chest, and Sam threw his head back with a scream, clinging so hard onto the headboard that his knuckled went white, lights popping in front of his eyes. He was pretty sure his heart actually stopped at one point. He wasn't even aware of Kurt and Blaine collapsing either side of him, and was only half aware of Kurt licking some of the come off his chest. He was kind of busy trying to remember how to breathe.

"Much... _much_ better... than Puckerman," Kurt laughed breathlessly.

"Totally," Blaine agreed, patting. "Don't tell him... we said that though..."

Sam just laughed, feeling happier and more exhausted than he ever had in his life. A combination of the alcohol and his intense orgasm meant that the three boys passed out under the duvet almost immediately, blissful smiles on all their faces.

Everyone was still suffering from a bit of a hangover at school on Monday. Kurt and Blaine were the first to get to Glee Club and sat together at the back of the choir room, both wearing sunglasses and Blaine half asleep against Kurt's shoulder. Rachel arrived soon after with Finn. She gave the boys a cold look and sat at the opposite end of the room, folding her arms and crossing her legs with a huff.

"We said we were sorry," Kurt said, exasperated. "Like, a million times."

"You two better be prepared to reimburse me," she said grumpily. "That's the third time I've had to throw away soiled bed linen _and_ I had to replace certain... certain _items_ that were taken from my Dads' bedside cabinet."

"We'll pay you back, Rachel," Blaine said as he raised his head off of Kurt's shoulder, wincing from the sound of her shrill voice.

The rest of the Glee Club started to arrive, many also wearing large sunglasses. Quinn was carrying a thermal container full of hot coffee, and took a seat as far away from Rachel as possible. The two girls glanced at each other once and looked away immediately, blushing. Finn was still looking suspiciously between his girlfriend and his ex-girlfriend, as if he expected them to suddenly start making out or something. Sam was the last to show up, walking rather gingerly. He chose the seat furthest away from Kurt and Blaine, trying his best not to wince too much as he sat down – sitting down had been a little uncomfortable since the morning after the party.

"You know," Santana said casually to no one in particular. "When I joined Glee Club I never banked on the parties being so... _eventful_."

Everyone grumbled in agreement. Kurt and Blaine looked at each other meaningfully. Sam didn't say anything at all. The only people that knew about what had happened at the end of the party were himself, Kurt, Blaine and Rachel, who had unceremoniously burst into the guest bedroom in the morning to turf them out, and Sam hoped that that would be all the people that would ever know about his night of drunken experimenting.

"Anyone else hear any, erm... _interesting_ noises coming from one of the bedrooms at the end of the night?" Puck suddenly said with a mischievous grin. "Like, banging and screaming?"

Blaine, who had been half asleep on Kurt's shoulder again, suddenly sat up, his cheeks going pink. Kurt was blushing too, his eyes wide behind his designer sunglasses. Sam's face was bright red and he stared determinedly in the opposite direction so he wouldn't have to look at anyone.

"It might have been Santana and me," Brittany said serenely. "We can get quite loud."

Santana didn't look embarrassed by that frank statement at all, just quietly pleased with herself.

"Oh no, it wasn't you ladies," said Puck, smirking. "It sounded more like _guys_. And it didn't really start until Kurt and Blaine disappeared upstairs... with Sam."

Everyone but the boys in question started sniggering and muttering to each other. Quinn choked on her sip of coffee. Finn looked confused. Rachel looked like she was desperate to say something but thought better of it.

"Oh – my – wanky," gasped Santana, taking her sunglasses off and looking delighted. "Did Auntie Tanny's number one twinks seriously turn Trouty Mouth?"

Kurt squirmed with embarrassment, and Blaine had now buried his face Kurt's shoulder out of shame. Sam looked as if he was wishing for the ground to just swallow him up. They didn't really need to answer since their awkwardness spoke a thousand words.

"Oh wow, that is super hot in my head," Brittany said, sounding awestruck. "Me and Santana were only a few doors down, you guys totally could've invited us along to watch!"

"Oh my God," said Finn, looking a little distraught. "I can't even... what the hell happened to this Glee Club? We used to be so... innocent."

"_Kurt _used to be so innocent," Santana chuckled. "But now in my mind he's just a sex demon. And a really awesome kisser."

Brittany, Puck, Artie, Mike, Quinn, Sugar and Rory all nodded in agreement to that last statement.

"I can't believe you told on us, Puckerman," Blaine said quietly. "Kurt and I didn't blab to the entire Glee Club when Lauren Zizes convinced you to have sex with us at the last party."

"Dude!" Puck exclaimed as everyone else in the room gasped and laughed.

"Oh, don't get your panties in a bunch, Noah," said Kurt, rolling his eyes. "Everyone would've found out sooner or later. And, in keeping with what is now apparently Honesty Hour, you love it. And Sam was better."

"Much better," Blaine agreed with sleepy nod.

Sam was still terribly embarrassed, but couldn't help but smile at that. Puck just looked disgruntled.

"I knew it," said Quinn. "I knew it! You three were acting so awkward and guilty the morning after the last party, I _knew_ something was up!"

"Holy sweet hell," Santana said, smirking wider than ever. "This is officially the greatest day of my life. Porcelain, Frodo, I am so proud of you guys right now. Also Lauren Zizes deserves some kind of award for services to wanky, because _oh my actual God_."

"Yes, yes, it's all very amusing," Kurt grumbled. "Can we all please, please, _please_ talk about anything else now? Also, Rachel, may I suggest that you stop throwing parties in your basement? I don't think I could take the shame."

"Excellent idea, Kurt," Rachel said stiffly.

Just then Mr. Schuester arrived and they were all forced to stop talking about the party. Kurt didn't even bother trying to tell himself that he would never drink again. It hadn't worked the last time... or the time before that.

* * *

><p>Hope you enjoyed the madness, Humble Readers :)<p>

xxx


End file.
